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This is Benton Fraser speaking. If you would kindly leave a message with your name and number, I will return your call at the earliest opportunity. Thank you.

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Hi, Brendan! I'm baking cookies this weekend, if you want to come and help or get some or...you know!

[ Total seriousface here, look. ]

That is quite unusual behavior for the species. One might almost convince oneself that it was dancing; of course the truth is rather different but no less anecdotal.

I think you'd be interested.

turtle be twerkin!

Well yes, Ray, the water is acting as a form of sexual stimulation.

so turtle be... getting off while twerkin? durty turtle

Precisely. Of course it's not that unusual. Vibration has that effect on a variety of sexually reproducing animals.

heh yeh vibrations. i can dig that. idk if i get turned on by water on my butt tho

In, perhaps.

idk bout that either. is that a thng?

Apparently, although I haven't ever tried it.

you read books or somethgn? how is it you no more than me huh?

Edited 2014-11-12 18:13 (UTC)

Yes, Ray, I read books. It's quite surprising what you can find in a library.

i mean like porno books then right?

It's called 'erotic fiction'.

you actually read that stuff? you get off on it and stuf?

Well no, Ray, it was purely academic.

yeh sure it was. academic so you could put it into practise right??

I can never make use of all the academia I've absorbed, Ray. However, if it tempts you, I'm certain I could instruct you in the process.

the process of reading?

The process of prolonged prostate stimulation via enema.

only you would get that frim a turtle vid fraser

Does that mean you're not interested?

i didnt say that!

Then what are you saying, precisely?

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