IC Contact

[dogsled]

This is Benton Fraser speaking. If you would kindly leave a message with your name and number, I will return your call at the earliest opportunity. Thank you.

Comments

[dogsled]

Well I know that now.

[kickem]

Well you shoulda guessed earlier, ya big dummy.

[dogsled]

I should have guessed earlier. I mean there were signs...

[kickem]

Signs? There were? Like uh, like what signs?

[dogsled]

Well there's the car. And the hair.

[kickem]

What d'you mean? What about the car and the hair?

[dogsled]

Well it's not... Neither are particularly attractive to women.

[kickem]

Uh, yeah they are. Chicks totally dig the car.

[dogsled]

They did in the seventies.

[kickem]

It's a timeless classic! Ladies appreciate a classic.

[dogsled]

No, Ray. Men appreciate a classic car. Women appreciate other things.

[kickem]

Whatever. Not even driving it to impress chicks anyway. It's for me and my dad.

[dogsled]

And the hair? Is that for your father too?

[kickem]

Screw you, Fraser.

[dogsled]

I thought that was what you were leading up to, Ray, but I apologize if I've been mistaken...

[kickem]

Hah, yeah. Not likely.

[dogsled]

[ Oh that's...really quite hurtful. Fraser pauses for a moment, taken aback, and then he speaks in a much softer, less confrontational voice than before: ]

Perhaps I should just bring enough clothes for tonight, just in case you change your mind by morning.

[kickem]

[Well, that makes two of them that are sulking.]

Fraser, I'm drunk not desperate. You can't go insultin' a guys car and his look and then expect to get you some.

[dogsled]

I--

[ Excuse him he has to pick his jaw up off the floor. ]

I would never--! Ray, I didn't mean it as an insult. Certainly not! Only that...

[ Think of words, Fraser. They're useful things. ]

Only that statistically speaking the hair and the car have attracted more male attention than female, and...

I'm sorry if I offended you.

[kickem]

Yeah.

Well. You called my hair gay. Who says that to a buddy?

[dogsled]

[ A little hard. ] I didn't consider it to be an insult.

[kickem]

Sayin' I'm not attractive to chicks is an insult.

[dogsled]

[ Long pause. ]

You're right, of course. I'm sorry, Ray.

[kickem]

Good. Don't you forget it.

Maybe I'll let you stay a little longer.

[dogsled]

I don't know, Ray. I'd be an imposition, wouldn't I? Perhaps just for Christmas.